Saturday, May 28, 2011

Nestle - what would we do without them?

What would we do without those brilliant people at Nestle?

As though being the kind and generous global food and drinks giant which has done SO MUCH to introduce unenlightened women of the developing world to the elegant, civilised art of feeding their babies 
 - in a way which, while it may have a few easily waved-away side effects (poor baby growth due to mothers trying to skimp on the stuff, limited protection against infection, dodgy hygiene, use of hard-earned pennies that could go elsewhere) DOES have the great benefit of making MORE MONEY for Nestle -
WERE NOT ENOUGH,
those clever people in the lovely, clean Nestle labs have come up with a true miracle of science: 

THE WORLD'S FIRST COMPREHENSIVE INFANT AND TODDLER NUTRITION SYSTEM!!!!!

here's the link to this great advance for humankind:

http://www.nestle.com/Media/NewsAndFeatures/Pages/Nestle-launches-BabyNes-first-comprehensive-nutrition-system-for-babies-Switzerland.aspx

And here's a picture of it in action:


D'oh! Silly me.

I just pasted in a picture of a woman breastfeeding her baby by mistake.
I'm such a klutz with this blogging business.

I mean, who on earth but a daft old non-techy would absent-mindedly think THIS was what is meant by "the world’s first comprehensive nutrition system for infants and toddlers"

I've just looked again at the Nestle website and I must have missed the bit where it says that the world's first comprehensive nutrituion system for infants and toddlers is "based on Nestlé’s latest scientific achievements in baby nutrition and systems technology"?

Aren't I just an old fluff-head.

 What could POSSIBLY have made me think that human lactation is any match for the global food and drinks giant's "unmatched expertise in baby nutrition gained over 145 years since the invention of Farine Lactée by Henri Nestlé" ?

No, HERE'S a picture of the world's FIRST COMPREHENSIVE INFANT FEEDING SYSTEM:



As if you could confuse the two!
I mean look at all the advantages of the "BabyNes" (for so it is named).
It hasn't been trialled for over 70 million years.
It doesn't change the nutritional content of the milk with the needs of the baby throughout the day.
It requires sterilising, measuring, checking.
It is not free.
It is not disposable or ecofriendly and it needs a power source.
It is not so easily packaged that you don't even have to remember to take it with you when you go out.
In fact, it's hard to see how we have managed without it all these years.

It says on the BabyNes page that Nestle "supports breastfeeding for the first six months of a baby's life".

I wonder how they do that.
I'm sure they have a way. I just haven't noticed it yet. 

On the other hand...wouldn't it be wonderful, if Nestle had just stuck to making great chocolate bars?

2 comments:

Mars said...

Love it!

Kim said...

Thank you Sarah, great to find a giggle in what is after all a pretty dismal situation! XX